of babes and dogs

It is a curious thing the connection between a kid and his/her dog, or dogs as the case may be.  If you need convincing that kids are sponges very early in life (I mean other than the fact that your toddler is prone to shouting endless repetitions of the latest epithet you threw at the driver of the white mini-van), just look at the things kids pick-up from the family pet.  I started to think about this in earnest as I noted this...

and then this...

I can only assume since neither N. nor I sit around with our tongues hanging lazily from our mouths, that he has picked this up from the pup.

[this may not seem to be the greatest cause for concern, but this picture of bean is not entirely representative of the extent to which his tongue just sort of hangs out...]

I also remember our niece, Miss K., picking up some interesting , shall we say, communication skills from their family dog, Gunther. She would pant expectantly while waiting to eat, and if you were to remove a toy or other shiny object from her grasp before she was “sufficiently done”, she would growl - a low, deep throaty growl.  Disconcerting? very, but also funny as hell, because, well... ain't my kid...

Now, I love my dogs, but we have not done the best job of training these animals… they are crazy spoiled and I am quite convinced that a good 75% of the neighborhood is afraid of them (they put on a serious show when people walk past the front of the house).  I am suddenly concerned about the “skills and habits” that butterbean may develop as a result of unlimited exposure to the fur babies, the cat included. I have drafted a list of potential habits, that we will need to nip in the bud:

• Throwing himself against the glass doors to indicate a desire to re-enter the house
• An obsessive need to follow me around the house if I have or might decide sometime in the future to pick up some kind of food item
• Blowing hot, nasty breath in my face beginning at 5:35 AM sharp until I decide to wake up and feed him
• The tongue thing… gotta get that fixed ASAP, perhaps having teeth will help
• Running around the house like a maniac anytime I mention to words “go” or “car” or “walk”
• Licking or sniffing of any kind as it relates to “special areas” -- his or others
• Jumping on furniture at 2 AM and knocking off all manner of chotchkes (vases, candles, glasses, picture frames) in order to wake up the house and scare the pups
• Spraying the walls and cabinets with all manners of spit and froth following any kind of cleaning (bath, ears, etc)
• Rubbing against walls and furniture obsessively, like some kind of perv in the dollar theater
• Crapping in the utility sink to indicate a displeasure with the current brand of food
  

And I thought that all i was going to have to keep an eye out for, in the way of bad influences, was smoking underneath the bleachers and "tramps-in-training" calling here in the middle of the night.

Man, parenthood is tough.

Comments

[buffi]

See, you think your little list there is clever. I regret to inform you that a good 85% of that is my life, day in & day out with my boys! Look out. Butterbean is just getting started!! ;) But golly-gee, he sure is a cutie pie!

[Dutch]

Oh my god I love your blog! I just realized it has a "fur babies" category! I was trying to convince my wife we should get a dog but your post has convinced me that we kind of already have one.